what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Randomize