GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
Randomize
