Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
