I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
