And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Randomize
