I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
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