If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
