lets start a swedish sibling band together
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Randomize
