I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
Found half of a five day old piece of pizza behind my dresser. Apparently it was drunkenly set there and got knocked down. It was such a happy reminder of last weekend.
I found a cheeseburger next to my tub once. It's there to shame you, but it always just makes me feel more awesome.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Randomize
