Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Randomize
