If i come over, it means nothing
i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
i've created a new STD.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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