ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
I'm sobbing to NWA
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize