dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Randomize