what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Randomize
