What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
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