He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
We had sex on a dog bed..
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Randomize
