the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
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