You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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