I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
Randomize