You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
Farmville is her only friend.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
17 year olds will be the death of me.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
Randomize
