you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize
