your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
