Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize
