last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
Randomize
