a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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