God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
