Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
