My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Randomize
