Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
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