the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
