i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
