Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
Randomize
