Do you still have your period?
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
Randomize