she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
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