Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
Randomize
