Non-Jews are for practice
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Randomize
