And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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