Duck Duck Cougar?
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
