i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
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