i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
Randomize
