I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
