You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
Randomize
