I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize
