The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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