My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Randomize