Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
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