Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
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