I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
