Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
Randomize
