woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
